Facing Forty Fiercely
I’m going a little off plot in today’s post. You see, by the time you read this, I’ll be 40.
I thought I’d be a lot more upset about turning 40, but it turns out that 30 was a lot harder. As I faced 30 in 2006, I’d just decided to become a writer instead of a lawyer, but I didn’t really know what it meant to “be a writer.”
Ryan and I had started our furniture business two years earlier and that too was still a bit of an unknown. I really thought I was going to be something by the age of 30 (a “Reality Bites” reference), but instead I felt uncertain about my future and less than confident about some of the choices I had recently made.
Over the last six months, as I faced 40, I realized that I felt much more at ease with turning 40 than I had with turning 30, and I began to pondered why. The answer was easy – it’s confidence. Today, I’ve got it in spades. I know who I am, and what I’m doing, and I love it.
This doesn’t mean that there aren’t difficult days. Last week we lost our 15 ½ year old cat that we’d had since he was a kitten. He was our “first child.” Our “second child,” our German Shepherd, is 13 ½ and is on a slew of medications. I have a scary eye surgery coming up on November 1.
So, no, life’s not perfect. But I am more at ease in my own skin than I’ve ever been before. I certainly don’t have it all figured out, but I’ve never been more confident as a writer and as a small business owner. I’ve made incredible connections throughout Colorado – relationships that have gone beyond networking and have entered the friends’ zone.
And speaking of friends, I’ve got a truly amazing group of people in my life. Not to mention, the world’s best and most supportive husband.
I was recently at a conference sitting at lunch opposite a handful of young, female millennials who were so self-conscious I wanted to give them each a hug. In that moment, I realized that I wouldn’t go back to the age of 23 even if a genie appeared and offered to give me three wishes. I may wish for my 23-year-old body, but I wouldn’t wish to turn back the clock, because 40 isn’t over the hill and 40 isn’t the new 30. Forty is 40, and I’m embracing it with everything I’ve got.
Thank you to everyone on this wild ride with me including my readers (aka HeidiTown citizens). I couldn’t do it without you and I wouldn’t want to.
This is “hello” from Mexico, because despite being fully confident about turning 40, I decided that doing it with my feet in the sand and a cerveza-in-hand would be the best way to celebrate 40 rotations around the sun. I’m not officially working on this vacation, but you’re welcome to follow my Mexico adventures @HeidiTown on Twitter and by checking out the hashtag I created for my birthday, #FacingFortyFiercely.